February 10, 2009

Ramblin' [Wo]Man

Continuing my life as a human Katamari ball, picking up life’s odds and ends, here are this week’s ramblin’ thoughts:

Update: The co-worker I flashed came by the next morning for his usual chat, having regained the color in his cheeks. My impromptu moment of unintended lewdness was not, has not been, never will be mentioned, apparently. As for me, I just repressed the whole thing instantly. I said, "I'm an adult, he's an adult, these things happen, it was an innocent mistake." And went on with my day. Until the drive home when I stopped at a red light...and started CRACKING UP. Seriously. I hooted, I howled, I snorted, tears poured down my face.

NOW I've dealt with it.

• Currently on the needles: footies. What’s not to love about a sock pattern that goes, essentially:

Step 1: Cast on.

Step 2: Divide for heel.

I could get used to that.

(Please pardon the pasty white ankle. I'd like to blame it on the camera but, no, I have pasty white ankles.)


• Benny is advancing in his yarn-destroying skills. Despite all my efforts to keep the Big B and my stash apart, yesterday morning I woke up to two sock-weight yarns—both connected to live, in-process projects—completely unwound...and scrambled up together like a large plate of other-worldly, brightly colored spaghetti. The eight bamboo needles and two projects were, thankfully, unharmed. I'm so proud of my talented boy I could just bust. Any day now, I expect to wake up to a macrame plant hanger.

• Is it evil of me, after having, over the months, gakked on enough cat fur to almost barf up my own hair ball, to feel a deep sense of satisfaction at finding one of MY hairs in the litter box and knowing that it got there through an, ahem, circuitous route?

• In a pet store over the weekend I stumbled across a bag of cat treats that just said Dried Mouse Cat Snacks. I thought, surely “mouse” is just a cute euphemism for something else; surely these are made with corn meal and chicken and are just called “mice” for marketing purposes. So I turned the bag over to look at the list of ingredients and it said, no lie: Mouse. Nothing else. Now I'm torn between cute and gross.

• Lurker Margaret sent me a link to, seriously, the funniest Web site evar. I may be late to the party on this one but if I can expose even one more person to the insanity that is Bent Objects, I will die happy. Don’t miss the two videos on the right. Oh, and all knitters need to look at this entry. Thank you, Margaret!!!!

• Made it through me birthday on Friday. Fun, not fun, a weird mix. But thanks to Big Sister, I can now open my kitchen cabinet and be greeted by this:


• Still on the subject of Big Sister and her creative gift-giving skills, remember how I said I had two life rules: Never go to Las Vegas and never use a Neti Pot? I forgot number three: Never own a...


Nix that rule. I've round-filed it next to "Never Own a Sock Monkey."

Next, Valentine’s Day. Crap. (Oops. Did I say that out loud?)

Posted by Ryan at 11:28 PM | Comments (14)

February 03, 2009

Why Me?

How not to start your Tuesday morning:

zipper2.bmpYou’re sitting at your desk. You're wearing a zippered jacket and a zippered cardigan with just a bra on underneath. A male co-worker and friend comes to chat. You decide you want to take the jacket off so, without looking, you grab a zipper tab and pull it down. Would’ve been nice if it had been the zipper tab of the jacket and not of the cardigan.

The zipper was down to my stomach before I realized what I had done. Male friend stammers, blushes and leaves abruptly, leaving me to wonder why I even got out of bed this morning.

Posted by Ryan at 11:31 AM | Comments (29)