One of the great free and fun adventures in life is trying new perfumes. Very occasionally, you hit the jackpot and find something that is "you," a perfume that mellows to a light cloud of scent that subtly accents every movement you make (or so we would like to think, eh, girls?). Or there are times like yesterday, when I tried a perfume on one wrist and an intriguing men's cologne on the other and spent the rest of the day smelling like a pimp that had spilled a strawberry milkshake on his pants. In fact, the perfume and cologne were so strong I smelled like a small army of pimps, all of whom inexplicably and en masse had spilled strawberry milkshakes on their pants. It was not pretty.
The smell reminded me of one of the houses we grew up in in New Jersey that was located halfway between a perfume factory and a dairy farm. Depending on the vagaries of the wind, our choices were: air that smelled like nuclear-powered strawberry jam interlaced with strong hints of concentrated rose syrup; air that smelled like methane and yard-deep piles of rotting manure; or, on days when the wind couldn't decide which way it wanted to blow, air that smelled like fresh, gooey cow patties that had been heavily spritzed with eau de parfum by a fussy farmer. Again, not pretty.
Knitting Knews
Now that the Aran pillow, the Aran baby sweater, and the chemo cap are all done, except for the second Catalina Sock, which I'm chugging along on, and the Perfect Sweater (which is calling me so pitifully and loudly from its bag that I have to stick my fingers in my ears and sing "la-la-la" every time I walk past it), I currently have no UFOs, and find myself in an unfamiliar knitting limbo. I'm toying with the idea of doing the Fibertrends clogs but I picked blue and green yarns for the clogs and just finished using using blue and green yarns for the chemo cap. Yawn. Complete knitter's ennui. I think this calls for another trip to the LYS (if you're keeping count, that's three visits in the past seven days) for something new and inspiring. Any ideas, Dear Readers?
You got me laughing...the army of pimps is what did it...
I know what I would like to make the clogs out of...wanna do a knit-a-long? Doubt they have it where you are..but you could do any number of things, like cascade or something. I wanna do mine out of Imperial stock ranch...it's out of eastern oregon, cheap ahem I mean inexpensive and has lots of yardage and nice colors. Let me know on the knit-a-long....Just putting it out there... :) Keep thinking good thoughts for me and my home pursuits. L
Posted by: Lisa in Oregon on March 5, 2004 10:31 AMHad to read the strawberry-milkshake-pimp-pants bit out loud to my son.
Posted by: Kit on March 5, 2004 10:34 AMLord, you are hilarious.
Posted by: Anne on March 5, 2004 10:39 AMYou've got me laughing too, although it's the eau de nuclear strawberry cow pies that did it for me.
We once lived in CA's ever-so-lovely (NOT) San Joaquin Valley in a burnt orange shag apartment snuggled east of the Ragu plant, south of peach orchards, north of an onion processing plant, and west of an Air Force Base. Ah, the aromatic memories.
As to knitting ideas, sorry, fresh out. I'm in a bit of a knitting funk. That bit of spring we had in the PNW was just enough to turn my head to thoughts of gardening instead. I'm doing the kind of mindless knitting one can do while sitting at the window daydreaming about what to plant where.
I vote for a trip to the LYS.
-Lo
Posted by: Lori on March 5, 2004 10:44 AMUrk, Lo! Eau de tomato, Italian spices, onion, peaches, fighter jet exhaust, and presumably ever-so-slightly musty orange shag rug?! You've got me beat!
And I know exactly what you mean about that "taste of NW spring." On the one beautiful day we had a couple of weekends ago, I swear TMK crammed an entire summer of activities into that one day because, as we all know, we never know how long our "good" February weather is going to last. BTW, whatcha' plantin', Lo?
M'dear Lisa, I'm intrigued by the idea of the knit along but I really want to do something that is not blue and green first. Maybe the next project? (But don't let my oh-so-vague plans hold you back; feel free to get started if you want).
Anne, Kit, thanks bunches for the comments! Glad you're still enjoying my inane Gratuitous Stories of the Day! (Kit, you gonna be at the next Feral Knitters meeting?)
Posted by: Ryan on March 5, 2004 11:05 AMwell to be perfectly honest, after I wrote that I thought "oh good grief, you just suggested a knit-a-long on something that has two pieces. You know you have a hard time finishing the second one...what WERE you thinking?"
Knitter, know thyself. ;) Lisa
Posted by: Lisa in Oregon on March 5, 2004 11:09 AMhad a most unfortunate perfume encounter once- walked through fragrance dept. of store during lunch hour and there sat a lovely 'try it on' bottle of halston (this was obviously years ago) so i liberally spritzed away- hey, it smelled great on a coworker so whodathunk it would react so violently with my own chemistry- when i returned to my office everyone looked around to see if there had been exterminators at work during our absence- end of story: i got to go home from work very early that day- we still refer to that encounter as my visit with 'eewdephew'-
fresh out of suggestions for a new project for you to take on but i am sure you will valiently slay any knitting dragon you encounter- i am in my own personal little hell with some corrugated ribbing that just doesn't want to cooperate-
Posted by: barb in texas on March 5, 2004 11:31 AMProbably won't be planting much this year. We've only lived on this spot since November so we're still in the getting-acquainted-with-our-microclimates phase of the gardening relationship. I've never gardened in WA before, much less on a wind-blown bluff composed of glacial till.
Still, I have the PNW Gardener's Book of Lists, Gardening with Native Plants of the PNW, and the Sunset Western Garden Book spread out on the table; notebook and sketchpad at the ready, and a head full of ideas.
-Lo
Posted by: Lori on March 5, 2004 01:01 PMFunny, I was just going to suggest the Sunset Western Garden Book. TMK swears by it. And, Lo, if you ever need someone to speak "gardening" with, TMK is a MANIAC gardener, has designed and landscaped her entire yard, and has even taken the botany course at Edmonds Community College. If you have any questions, I'd be more than glad to pass them on!
Posted by: Ryan on March 5, 2004 01:14 PMJust entered a call for dispatch tonight right before I left work. Nothing matters about the call exept that it involved a pimp from Oakland named KnocKnock. I can't MAKE this stuff up.
I *heart* the corgi story. Blame it on PMS, but I welled. Don't tell.
Posted by: Rachael on March 5, 2004 07:12 PMI really must learn to stop drinking prior to opening a web page with your blog. Fresca isn't nearly as refreshing when it fizzes through your sinuses and out your nose instead of producing a happy citrusy glow in your stomach.
In response to your knitting blahs, perhaps a simple booga bag in a bright and cheerful varigated yarn would cure those, uh, blues? You can knit and get into a nice zone and ponder your next project while still enjoying the rhythm of knitting....
Posted by: perclexed on March 6, 2004 06:43 PMI consider myself to be quite the fragrance hound (I seek out yarn stores and perfume shops equally enthusiastically when I visit new cities) but I have yet to find a pimp/strawberry milkshale scent! Hilarious. (I make pilgrimages to The Perfume House in Portland, OR a few times a year; probably the best selection of fragrances in the nation. I know, how could it be in Portland, OR? Don't know, but it is).
Posted by: Susanna on March 8, 2004 10:20 AMSusanna, I'm not surprised that you make an extra effort to smell nice because I know you alway LOOK nice. You may not remember ever having met me but we were both in Acorn Street once and I asked you where you got your hair cut because your hair looked so stylish. In fact, I still have your card with the address and number of the salon on it.
Congratulations on your new business and web site. I've noticed your patterns cropping up at Acorn Street!
Posted by: Ryan on March 8, 2004 10:51 AM