October 22, 2004

Feeling Can-tankerous!

This is probably the most personal thing I will ever write in this blog, but here goes: I’m sitting in my office, at my desk, with a can of cold Coke stuffed inside my pants. Now, now; minds out of the gutter everyone (although I’m not really sure what’s so titillating about bare skin and freezing cold aluminum). The mundane truth is that I wrenched my lower back muscles and The Mysterious K—who is The Reluctant Queen of Bad Backs—has admonished me to keep icing it. I had every intention of doing so last night but somehow I never managed to get me, my back, a comfortable place to sit, and an ice pack all in the same place at the same time. Today, however, I crept and lurched and groaned my way down to the break room, got a very cold can of Coke out of the vending machine…and had a eureka moment as I crept and lurched and groaned my way back to my office. I wonder, I sez to myself, if stuffing this can of Coke in the back waistband of my pants will have the same effect as using a cold pack? So, here I sit, can in my pants, smug in the knowledge that I am following the spirit of TMK’s Bad Back Law, if not the letter. Which forces me to say to TMK Norma’s favorite phrase, Neener, neener.

(A late-in-the-afternoon update: I just realized that my stiff back is making me walk like a duck. That can't be pretty.)

Speaking of smugness, remember how in my last entry I e-wagged my e-finger at Dear Reader Kit, she of the Eighth Wonder of the World, and said she had to bring her garden hat to Guild for the Felted Fashion/Art show? Well, I’m feeling rather pleased with myself since her hat was voted Most Beautiful! Like a total doof, I forgot to take my camera, but let me see if I can describe this creation to you. The hat itself is a simple felted rolled-brim concoction out of a dusty purple (like dusty pink, only not) yarn. The magic comes from what Kit added to the simple felted rolled-brim concoction. From some very odd yarn she found at a yard sale—a sort of rubbery looking amalgamation of brown and green fibers which looks more like something you would use to skid-proof a floor mat than yarn—she knit a wide "moss" hatband. Then she knitted and sewed on a profusion of brightly colored, three-dimensional flora: Flowers, daffodils, narcissi, pansies, leaves and I don’t remember what’all. She topped it off with a knitted stick and an orange knitted snake, complete with stripes, eyes, and a little red forked tongue. I think there’s even a store-bought bird in there somewhere. A great hat! High five to you on the win, Kit!

The other awards were Funkiest, Funniest and Most Favorite. Funkiest went to a pair of Felted Clogs that were embellished to look like ladybugs, complete with spots and waving antennae. Funniest was awarded to some adorable, tiny, cream-colored “mouse slippers” with eyes, ears, a nose and a tiny felted tail. Favorite went to a stunning forest green, cream and terra cotta domino-knit basket. If anyone is looking for ideas for an event at your Guild, I think this went over really well.

Speaking of garden hats, flowers and pretty things, here’s a photo of TMK’s camellia, which is not supposed to flower for another three or four months, but we won’t go there. In a growing season when your fall flowers bloomed in early June, your winter plants bloomed in October, and your mid-summer plants bloomed in mid-fall, we've learned not to question these things.

camellia.jpg


Posted by Ryan at October 22, 2004 10:14 AM
Comments

I think the Coke can inserted in the back of the pants is ingenious! And it gives a pretty interesting visualization, too.

Posted by: Nathania on October 22, 2004 10:49 AM

Having inherited bad back tendencies (thanks, Dad), I can truly sympathize. One of the best bits of advice I ever received in that regard, during a particularly bad episode, was from a chiropractor who recommended alternating hot and cold packs -- and the best part was the DIY, no-cost factor. He told me to moisten (fairly damp) two kitchen or hand towels, fold them however you can (nice size, but flat) and put each into a zip-lock plastic bag. Stick the first in the microwave for a few seconds, while the second gets good and cold (stiff as a board is not desirable, but it can work) in the freezer, and alternate them as needed (with a few minutes in between). The best part is that they're pretty flexible and tuck nicely into a waistband. You won't have that humpback-coke-in-the-pants look!

Posted by: Vicki on October 22, 2004 10:53 AM

should generate some interesting hits from search engines too! do you ever wonder just who goes looking for some of the bizarre things that crop up?

guild must have been wonderful- all of you northwest fiber folk make for great entertainment when you get together (said with envy and a pitiful sigh)-

hope the back improves and you can enjoy the beautiful flowers- stay happy-

Posted by: barb in texas on October 22, 2004 10:55 AM

I spent an entire afternoon with a can on my knee in the spring after puncturing it on an open louvered window. It really did help with the swelling. Any chance someone's got pix of the Guild winners? I'd love to see the slippers as well as the hat.

Posted by: maggi on October 22, 2004 10:57 AM

See, Maggi, your question is exactly why I was a doof for not taking my camera (although now that I think about it, TMK may have had the photo storage card in her possession so I couldn't have taken photos anyway). No, sorry; no photos.

Barb, there's no question my back will get better, fortunately. The frustrating thing is there's never any reason WHY it does this, so I don't have anything to avoid in the future to prevent it. Argh!

Vicki, both TMK and I are big believers in the "wet towel in the freezer trick." We call them "towel pops"--you know, like frozen freezer pops?--and always have one or two in the freezer for emergencies. I like the idea of the microwaved one, though. I think I'll try it tonight.

Nathania, Vicki, yeah, the can-in-the-pants look is pretty funny. I'm just happy there was enough room in my waistband to FIT a can of Coke!

Posted by: Ryan on October 22, 2004 11:41 AM

Ryan--the coke can in the pants had me first open-mouthed, and then chuckling....I guess it would work...you get A for ingenious effort, in any event. Thanks for the Guild update--I'm sorry too that there are no pictures--I missed the Guild because (a) I didn't finish my felted clogs and the felted bag I made was so mediocre that I wasn't even proud of showing it off; and (b) THE RED SOX were winning, and I had this awful feeling that if I stopped watching they might lose to the dreaded Evil Empire (aka Yankees), and so I got sucked into the game, and before you knew it, it was too late to go to Guild. Some may find this a lousy excuse, perhaps, but there you are. Knitting sometimes has to take a back seat to baseball.

AND speaking of baseball, and TMK's affection for the game, et al.--I looked on a map of New York, too and you know, Rhinebeck (or Ryanbeck) isn't all too far from Cooperstown, home of the Baseball Hall of Fame. And if you do go to Rhinebeck, then, of course a trip to Cooperstown must be made. Been there once, and it is a real treat, for those baseball lovers among us. I love history and baseball and this place is oozing both all over the place.
Whoever suggested the train, I agree--it's a great way to travel, then rent a car while you're there in New York. Plan on taking at least 3 weeks, though, which is definitely doable if you plan ahead. You guys will have a wonderful time!
Mary
PS TMK, your woodworking wonder skill is impressive. I love that box you are making. What will be stored in it? Some wonderful treasures,I hope--maybe Ryan's yarn???

Posted by: Mary B on October 22, 2004 12:05 PM

Hey cuz--I got periodic lower back trauma, too. Three times, I've had spasms of such excrutiating agony that I had to crawl to the phone and dial 911. Ice is truly your friend, preferably one of those big, squishy, re-freezable bags. But here's the thing--sitting is the absolutely worst position, stress-wise. You should be flat.

Try aspirin, too. Relaxes the muscles some.

Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on October 22, 2004 01:24 PM

I definitely wouldn't use the phrase "neener, neener" in this situation, though. Laughing is the last thing you want when you're in back pain. I've had my share. So has my hubby, poor thing. One year we were packing to get ready to visit his relatives for Thanksgiving. After a while, I suddenly realized I had not seen or heard from him in a good long while. I hunted him down all over the house. (I figured he was just avoiding the packing, dontcha know) He was on his hands and knees in the laundry room and could not get up. It sounds funny now, but it sure wasn't then. Well, ok, it WAS actually kind of funny, but not to him. I just couldn't understand why he was there for, like, an HOUR, without calling out to me!

Posted by: Norma on October 22, 2004 01:42 PM

What, Cuzz? You're not buying the self-medicating with a can in your pants theory? (I have noticed for the last few days that sitting is a real bear. I've reconfigured my office chair six ways to Sunday but it doesn't seem to make any difference. Unfortunately, until literally "lying down on the job" is deemed okay, my uselessly ergonomic chair it is.) Some day I'll have to tell you about the time I had to crawl down the hallway in my house, from my bedroom to the bathroom, and crawled right into the 2" of water that had leaked through the roof while I was asleep. It was NOT a good night.

Mary, you are not alone. Our Fearless Feral leader, Karen, stayed home from Guild to watch the Sox also. It seems your collective mojo helped them win!

Funny you should mention Cooperstown, since that is where my father is buried--and I've never seen the grave again since the funeral, although I've wanted to. (I tried once, but unexpectedly had a seizure that prevented the trips--but that's another long story). Anyhoo, Mary, you just added more motivation to the pile! (Although I gotta say, three weeks?! Har, har, har.)

Posted by: Ryan on October 22, 2004 01:44 PM

Just HAVE to put my two cents on the back care. After my 2-year-long-ordeal of crutches and hobbling and ice and ibuprofen and percocet and threats of morphine and surgery and being dressed by Ryan because I couldn't navigate my socks, I discovered that standing is always better than sitting when my back hurts. So I have TWO workstations--one is for sitting days and one is for days when I prefer to stand to work. Of course, when you have a REAL job it's tough to talk the boss into two complete workstations for one person. ;-)

Also, in my experience, sitting still, or standing still for that matter, for long periods of time actually makes your back stiffen up and is that much sorer (is "sorer" a word?) when you start moving.

And I have to put in my plug for the miracles of the swimming pool. I'm a walking, lifting, moving testament to wonders of swimming.

;-) TMK

Posted by: The Mysterious K on October 22, 2004 01:55 PM

Yes, definitely 3 weeks. I mean, look, you'll want to take at least 4 days on the train, then 2 or 3 days at Rhinebeck, at least 3 or 4 days to visit your new friends, and then a 2 or 3 day trip to Cooperstown. (And knowing you've wanted to get to see your Dad's grave there, well, that about seals the idea for going to Cooperstown, now doesn't it?) Then the 4 days home on the train. That's 17 or 18 days right there. And it's best to set aside some extra time so you can stop and enjoy stuff that just seems to "pop up." You and TMK will have an opportunity to spend lots of quality time together. After 18 years together (congrats on your anniversary, BTW) you owe yourselves a real hum-dinger of a vacation. Yes, definitely 3 weeks. And think of all the knitting you can do on the train!!!

Mary

Posted by: MaryB on October 22, 2004 02:01 PM

My family knows a thing or two about bad backs (and bad knees). We have that crazy height thing going for us. I'm the shortest at 6' and have two brothers at 6'4" and 6'7". We couldn't survive without the icy hot stuff. Salon Pas patches were what got us through the day (my brother calls them the good mojo) but Icy Hot has their own version now too.

Also, the best ice pack you can keep in your freezer are a couple of bags of peas. They keep the cold at just the exact right temp and they bend around funny shapes. If you do keep refreezing these you probably don't want to eat them but they aren't expensive and we never are without 'em.

Posted by: Laurie on October 22, 2004 07:39 PM

Oh Ryan, your poor back. I second the peas. Works great. Can-tankerous? Snork.

Posted by: Stephanie on October 24, 2004 09:25 AM

I have to add my sympathies for the back pain. Since I threw mine out once by leaning over to see a necklace clasp in the mirror, I can guarantee I'd be using the can of Coke to swallow three Aleve. That's roughly the prescription strength I used to get, and the caffeine makes it stronger. Then I'd microwave our rice-filled heating pad. Too much of a wimp to use the ice, I guess.

My mom and my husband have both had back surgeries (twice for my mom), and they both advise getting up and moving around periodically. Well, that and not stepping into the car. Evidently, you're supposed to sit down first, then swing your legs in one at a time. I'm still having trouble with that; it's okay if you're wearing pants, but rather entertaining for your neighbors if you're wearing a straight skirt.

Posted by: Beth on October 24, 2004 07:03 PM
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