As happens occasionally, this entry borders on the mildly R-rated. Not for the kiddies!
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As the webmaster here at work, I am the lucky, lucky, oh-so-lucky recipient of all the wacko spam churned out daily by wacko people. Oh, look, here comes one now. The contents? "Alleyway americanahymen degas lausanneminimum lawmen ibexemissary alimony cauliflower divergent pseudo chomskyillustrate neuritis paralysis nutrition sacrilege productembassy duma telecommunicateaural clog modulus schoolroom vanish pompcoexistent afterword cloudybeep hollywood banalchokeberry." Oy. (Although I am rather taken by "cloudybeep.")
If I were a Martian, and all I knew of Earth was this constant stream of spam, my impression of humans would be that they are only interested in two things: (1) Staggeringly huge male genitalia and (2) new and creative ways to use the staggeringly huge male genitalia. However, being an Earthling, I know that the horrendously annoying spam is only one element of our continuously more interconnected world, and I also know the one way in which the Web redeems itself for the constant stream of rubbish: Free online literature (and by “literature,” despite the fact that the spammers would like to steer me in that direction, I do not mean the kind about staggeringly huge male genitalia and the new and creative ways to use the staggeringly huge male genitalia).
(Afternoon update: Big Sister says this entry gives a whole new meaning to the title of my last entry. She said it; not I!)
When I eat at my desk (like I did when, oh, say, I was avoiding the broadcast of Bush’s acceptance speech on the break room TV), it astounds me that I can simply go online and pick, just pick, for free, a major work of no-longer-copyrighted literature to read then and there. And the truly kicky thing is, being somewhat scatterbrained and capricious (ask The Mysterious K; she'll tell you), I never know what my mind is going to be hungry for. For example, yesterday I finished reading Henrik Ibsen’s “A Doll’s House" and, and just for grins, started "Plato’s Apology." True, I left long, black, smoky skid marks on my brain switching from the one to the other, but mostly I was left feeling, How cool is this? A sandwich in one hand, a can of soda in the other (yes, in my hand, not in my pants), and endless pages of free brain food at my fingertips. It doesn’t get any better than that. (Incidentally, if you're interested in taking advantage of all this online literary goodness, a couple of good places to start are Project Gutenberg and Bartleby.)
Not much knitting news, but soon, very soon I will run my first Mossy Cottage contest, as soon as I figure out a suitable prize. Anyone want a large, old, and dusty skein of fuchsia acrylic? In the meantime, here’s a site whose content in no way constitutes literature but which is amusing and entertaining and thought-provoking all the same.
if you want a wacky erad at lunch and you are not thinking literature.. try www.engrish.com they update it frequently enough that when I go back I have new things to read.
Posted by: anj on November 10, 2004 10:27 AMYes, just last week I discovered that you can read 'Lysistrata' online. Ask Sam why...
Posted by: CarolineF on November 10, 2004 10:27 AMWhat, no one is screaming for the large, old, and dusty skein of fuchsia acrylic?
And Caroline, please, please reveal the mystery about how you stumbled across Lysistrata. Sounds like a good 'un.
Posted by: Ryan on November 10, 2004 10:30 AMI LOVE project gutenberg....they have such a great collection of 19th and early 20th cent books for girls, like the patty series etc.
and while I may be a 21st century confirmed bachelore, who doesn't like a story with lots of attention to clothes and social interaction for a little light reading.
why, fuschia acrylic would tickle my fancy just fine- and, in the light of today's posting, doesn't that just have a porno-sound to it?
free e-literature is the blessing of the internet to all who reside far from good libraries-
stay happy-
Posted by: barb in texas on November 10, 2004 11:00 AM1) Go look up the premise of 'Lysistrata'
2) Recall Sam has 3 teenage daughters
3) Recall who won the election
4) See the 11/9 entry at http://www.mamaliz.org/blogs/askmamaliz/
It will thus add up for you, trust me.
I think the contest should be who can do the neatest thing with the ball of fuschia acrylic.
If there was enough of it we could knit a car cover. Is there enough for a car bra? See, with the acrylic we can just throw it in the washer and dryer to get rid of the bug splats.
Posted by: Laurie on November 10, 2004 01:41 PMOoh ooh!! I want fuschia acrylic! 'Course, I am evil and will just make something of it and send it back to you. That's called 'irony'. Although, I don't know that it would tickle anything for me as it would Barb.
The update from your sis cracked me up. Growth through Pleasure indeed.
Hope everyone has a great day!!
Posted by: Stalker Angie on November 10, 2004 03:13 PMI keep getting spam for pen1s enlargement. I have a couple of questions:
1. Will the enlargement impair my ability to write?
and
2. What happened to pens 1A through 1R?
The mysteries of the cosmos...
Posted by: Robbyn on November 10, 2004 03:49 PMHar, har, Robbyn!
And what about that oh-so-clever substitution of "ones" for "els?" I get mail for V1cod1in and C1alis and V1agra and, oh, so much more. If the spammers insist they aren't doing anything wrong ("blahblahblah freedom of speech blahblah"), then why the need to camouflage their mail? I know it's so that security filters won't suss them out, but still, it's proof positive that they know what they're doing, and how annoying it is.
Posted by: Ryan on November 10, 2004 04:24 PMCloudybeep is lovely....though I must say that for the rest of the day I won't need fine online literature, for I may contemplate "clog modulus".
Posted by: Stephanie on November 11, 2004 06:30 AMThis brings up something I find odd and, frankly, of deep concern: when watching high-testosterone programs such as, say, the Super Bowl, have you noticed the obsession with sexual images of women--suggestive beer ads, cheerleaders doing pole dances--coupled with (no snickering!) the apparent need to correct for American men being unable to achieve erections naturally? What is going on?????
Add to this disturbing situation such stalwart protectors of the American moral scene as John Ashcroft, and, well, you just know why so many people are obese: Eating is the only thing left.
Posted by: Janine on November 11, 2004 06:35 AMApparently tantalizing pictures are so ubiquitous and easy to access that they are no longer tantalizing. Therefore men need medicinal assistance. And the women who agree to participate in the making of said ex-tantalizations are just making it worse for themselves and the rest of us. This is totally aside from any moral argument the likes of Mr. Ashcroft or Mr. Robertson might make, of course.
Speaking of Mr. Robertson, I was unfortunate enough to see the first three minutes of the 700 Club or whatever it is that he does. His first words? Making fun of the people who are upset about the outcome of the election. They're in an emotional crisis, he said, laughing. All the psychologists in Hollywood should be kept very busy for a while, he smirked. Whatever happened to "judge not, lest ye be judged"??
I have no idea why I got on this subject, I'll leave now!
Posted by: Sheila on November 11, 2004 10:52 AMSheila: And isn't that Robertson guy supposed to be a christian? What happened to "christian compassion?" I don't think he's supposed to be laughing at other people's misery. He's setting a very bad example for us pagans. I think he's going to be in god's doo-doo house when he dies!
TMK
Posted by: The Mysterious K on November 11, 2004 11:15 AMThis was a real snorter, God help us and thanks awfully -
I, too, like *cloudybeep* - what do you suppose it means?
Posted by: Childe on November 11, 2004 11:40 AMTMK, exactly my point! Of all people he should be setting the example for compassion and praying for we poor deluded pagans and agnostics. But you see, it's *OK* because he has already confessed his sins and asked the Lord Jesus Christ into his heart, so no matter what he does, he will still go to Heaven. Neener neener.
Posted by: Sheila on November 11, 2004 12:02 PMAck! The comments are decaying into man-bashing and Christian-bashing! I thought I made it clear: Our shared mantra is SUPPOSED to be "Death to the spammers!" :-)
Posted by: Ryan on November 11, 2004 12:47 PMGod has a doo-doo house!? I am *so* staying a Buddhist.
I'm off with a friend for a soul-cleansing weekend birding in far SE AZ, with special attention paid to the wintering flocks of thousands of Sandhill Cranes. Full report on my blog Monday.
Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on November 11, 2004 04:23 PMI'm just stopping by to say hi. I'm already in a few doo-doo houses with my foul language, I guess. It's ok. Compost happens. You already know what I think, so I'll shut up now. Love you guys!
Posted by: Norma on November 12, 2004 09:26 AM