My apologies for posting so late but it’s always satisfying when one has someone to blame, and in this case I get to blame Cuzzin Tom. For reasons that will become clearer next week, he had asked to be today’s quasi-semi-pseudo-mock-virtual-wannabe-sorta-kinda guest blogger but was unexpectedly spirited away (pardon the pun) by his monkly duties before he could get anything written. Which left me with a deer-in-the-headlights look plastered all over my face and nuthin’ to post. I usually spend Thursday night’s treacle-slow commute home and Friday morning’s treacle-slow commute to work mentally drafting a blog entry, but last night and this morning, knowing I had a guest blogger all lined up, I drove to-and-fro blissfully empty-headed (no comments from TMK the peanut gallery). So, see? Nuthin’.
I do know, however, that I want to thank everyone for playing the Mini-Meal Game. Such clever and unique suggestions, Dear Readers, more than one of which had me on the floor! I can't tell you how many times I called TMK or she called me to say, "Did you see the guppy thing? Or the one about the s'mores? Or the Baby Bel idea? Or miniature quiches? Or, or, or?" But, now, as an antidote to all of the sweetness and cuteness, I offer this. Anyone want to play the Mondo-Meal game?
For further excitement, I can tell you that TMK’s neighbor directly across the street came home yesterday to discover that a stray rifle bullet from God-knows-where had penetrated the wall of her (the neighbor’s) house, bounced around in the living room for a while, and exited through her roof. Ack! And double-ack! Before going to TMK’s place tonight, I think I’ll drop by my friendly local Kevlar Vests ‘R Us. And then take TMK by the ear, plop her in front of her computer, and watch like a hawk as she finds a new place to live. And then spend the rest of the evening designing a knitted cover for my new best friend, my bullet-proof vest. What do you think, knitters? Eyelash yarn? Something with a little glitter? Some angora for a little feminine flair? Intarsia'ed gun and bullet motifs?
Until next week, Dear Readers...
Posted by Ryan at December 3, 2004 02:31 PMUrmph...cue Zeppelin's "Communication Breakdown". I thought my part was a coupla sentence add-on and my (very) last-minute bail wasn't going to be so troublesome. Ryan, can I see you in the kitchen for a moment? Mind the camel...
Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on December 3, 2004 03:03 PMOh. Pooh. Sorry. Can I blame you anyway?
And it really wan't that troublesome, Cuzz; I'm just trying to manipulate my readers' feelings and win the pity vote. Oh, wait, did I say that out loud?
Can I go back to the living room now?
Posted by: Ryan on December 3, 2004 03:15 PMI say skip the cover and knit yourself a kevlar vest...
http://www.syntheticthread.com/kevlar.htm
Posted by: melissa on December 3, 2004 03:22 PMHmm....wonder if my Stalkers Union card would be revoked if I started stalking Melissa on the weekends. That had to be the most awesome response in the history of responses. And with a link to boot. Knit a kevlar vest.....had my jaw on the ground. They actually sell kevlar thread!?!? I think Melissa should get some sort of special prize for that one. Truly. And it's small enough to knit beading onto it.
I dare someone to order some and make something of it. It comes in a "large selection of stock colors or they can dyed be to match your unique color." See that?? "dyed to match." The possibilities are endless. And it does come in yarns, not just thread. A little kevlar rip-cord yarn to match your fuschia combat boots and you'll have an outfit that will be fashionable, yet safe, in any combat situation. I just love it.
Hope everyone has a great weekend.
Posted by: Stalker Angie on December 3, 2004 03:47 PMI read "Monkey duties" rather than monkly duties....gave me a snort or two, let me tell you.
Bullets????? Man that's scary. Sounds like Kevlar time to me, too.
Is TMK all blase about the whole thing?
L
Posted by: Lisa in Oregon on December 3, 2004 03:55 PMTMK has actually been suprisingly blase. She is more concerned about her neighbor than she is about anything else, bless her heart.
Posted by: Ryan on December 3, 2004 04:01 PMWell, Lisa, you're not the only one.
In stark contrast to the top of my head, the rest of my body is luxuriously hirsute (it's OK, let it out: EWWWWW). When I was in Penor Rinpoche's South India monastery in '91, the little monks would come around and they loved to pet my arm, giggle, and say, "Monkey, monkey."
Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on December 3, 2004 04:06 PMOkay, I'll say it: EUWWWWW!
Posted by: Ryan on December 3, 2004 04:22 PMhttp://www.livescience.com/scienceoffiction/technovel_nanofiber_041124.html
bulletproof yarn from "The Keyboard Biologist"
oh my, sounds like time to get the whole commune thing into gear and head away from the city- there are times when i am glad i live in the boondocks where we are safe in our living rooms (although during this season no one wanders around outdoors very much for fear of being mistaken for a deer)- i'm glad the 'adventure' ended without real tragedy-
i've just encountered a really strange acrylic from a bag of mystery yarns- among some really nice stuff (lovely 100% wools and some wool/cotton blends) there was a skein of something called 'pop n yarn' or something like that, and i swear it would work up quite nicely into that bulletproof vest- and wearing a vest made from it could serve double duty as a back brace for any occasion-
stay safe and stay happy-
Posted by: barb in texas on December 3, 2004 07:19 PM
Poor Cuzzin Tom--it's just worldwide trauma for you, isn't it?
I vote for a bullet-proof vest cozy knitted in a fabulously early '80s pink and blue argyle pattern. I imagine that ought to be enough to scare the heck out of any bullet-wielding freak. (Yes, I owned a vest that looked like that. Hey, I was 12 and an ubergeek.)
Posted by: Kristen on December 3, 2004 09:39 PMI have that Martha Stewart cookbook (someone gave it to me....I didn't buy it.) that tells you how to make coffee for 250. It's always given me the heebie-geebies, but if you're doing a camel...
Posted by: Stephanie on December 6, 2004 05:34 AMI think if you are making an argyle kevlar vest it should have some hazard orange in it.. I mean we are trying to deter hunters. I'm just sayin'
Posted by: anj on December 6, 2004 09:41 AM