How to make yourself feel fat:
1. Get into your car and then use the seat-adjuster system to raise your seat up absolutely as far as it will go, until, in fact, the mechanism starts whining and grinding in protest.
2. Lift your butt up.
3. Pull up on the seat-adjustment button again.
4. Feel the seat easily and smoothly rise up another four inches.
How to make yourself feel good:
Read this number: 996.
Read it again: 996.
Say it out loud.
Clap your hands together and smile.
Do a little dance.
Grab a complete stranger and hug him until his face turns blue and he is gasping for breath.
That’s the number of items that F.I.R.E. has received so far!!! Way to go, y’all!!!
How to make yourself feel motivated:
Realize that we still need 3,522 items to be sent to F.I.R.E. before July 1 to reach our goal of 4,518. The good news is that I know that a lot of people are knitting feverishly out there, and that the number of items destined for Dulaan took a huge leap upward during the Olympics. That, and I, personally, have in my garage a large bin of items that have been given to me that I have yet to mail. (Yes, in my garage. It’s all part of the scam, folks, all part of the scam.)
Although I haven’t picked a particular day yet, I have this idea percolating in my brain that sometime during the next couple of months I should propose that a particular day be Dulaan Knitting Day and ask interested participants—which may well end up just being me—to start and finish one item for Dulaan on that day. Would you participate?
Speaking of Dulaan and hats and things that could be knit in one day, for me, one of the most satisfying and rewarding parts of Dulaan is discovering that knitters have designed patterns specifically for the Project like the Dulaan Easy-On Kid Mittens and Ken's Dulaan Hat and the Double-Thick, Super Warm Dulaan Hat and, now, thanks to Kay of Mason/Dixon Knitting, The Corrugated Dulaan Hat pattern (pdf). Thank you, Kay! What a kick those hats are!
On the non-Dulaan knitting front, I would like to propose a new acronym for an Unfinished Object, the UFOBOB: UnFinished Object Because of Buttons. Personally, I think a UFOBOB—a knitted item that is 100% complete except for the sewing on of the buttons—is infinitely worse than your garden-variety UFO because There’s Just No Excuse. I mean, you’ve done all the grunt work: All the pieces have been knit, they’ve all been seamed together, all the yarn ends have been woven in, all you need is ten frickin’ minutes, the buttons, and a needle, and—voila!—your UFOBOB will be converted to an FO, a finished, wearable, useable garment. Case in point: Remember these sweaters destined for the grandtwins of a co-worker?
They have been languishing in UFOBOB status for, oh, 1.5 months now. I’ve even had the buttons all that time. Shame, Ryan, shame. But, phew!, this weekend I finally broke through the UFOBOB barrier…and, ta-dah!
Here, the silver star buttons on the purple sweater, in almost an electron-microscope close-up, thanks to TMK’s super-duper camera:
And, in another electron-microscope close-up, the pearl buttons on the green sweater:
Now, however, the sweaters are languishing in FONGTRBYWTTTTGWISAWA status—Finished Object Not Given To Recipient Because You Want To Take Them To Guild Which Is Still A Week Away. I did take them to work and wave them in front of the recipient but then snatched them away and said she could have them on March 16, the day after Guild. I have gone from being shameful to being heartless—definitely a lateral move.
I would totally participate in a Dulaan knitting day...in fact, I would throw a party at my house for other Dulaan knitting fiends. Why don't you pick a nice weekend day and we can see how many Dulaan knitting parties we can come up with?
Posted by: lyssa on March 8, 2006 11:16 AMDon't worry, I've got more items . . . and I know that I've convinced other people out there in the blogospere to knit for Dulaan. I also talked about it at the Knit Cafe here in Toronto.
Hmmm. .. I'm thinking of designing something for Dulaan now :)
Posted by: celtic knitter on March 8, 2006 11:24 AMThose leetle sweaters are to die for. Shame on you for letting them be UFUBOBs for so long, and then waving them in front of her face? Meanie.
Yay on the scam! It's moving right along there. I'm in love with Kay's new hat pattern. Can't wait to do one. My current tally is 18.5 items, with the help of Rachel H's hat that arrived the other day. The point five is one mitten of a pair. wonder if I'll ever do that second little critter?
Posted by: Norma on March 8, 2006 11:46 AMI have a UFOBUEQ....Unfinished Object Because of Ethical Questions. I have a cute little sweater I was knitting for a little girl now in college (no, not really, but she's outgrown it by a couple of years...) So I thought AHA! Dulaan. But the question is -- the sweater has a house motif on it. Isn't it perhaps a wee bit tactless to send a sweater with houses as the pattern to a homeless child? Should I frog it all out and start over? Help! Cousin Tom???
Posted by: joan on March 8, 2006 11:54 AMHow about a Dulaan Week where you ask particpants to dedicate at least one day to Dulaan knitting? Calendars are soo hard to coordinate.
Posted by: Kat on March 8, 2006 12:00 PMI'd be all over a Dulaan Day or Week, and would certainly consider hosting an event (unless, ahem, Maggi speaks up for it?) to celebrate.
Posted by: MaryB in Richmond on March 8, 2006 12:10 PMWOW
Nice close-ups. :)
I'm in for Dulaan Day. Sounds great.
Posted by: Ranger Susie on March 8, 2006 12:29 PMSign me up for Dulaan day. Now I have to go buy more yarn so I can have leftover balls - is that how it works?
Posted by: Elaine on March 8, 2006 12:38 PMI'm yours in Dulaan for a Day! Can I tell you in comments that you can add me to your Crasaders list? I've got the yarn to make a few cloud hats and might get a little cardigan made too. Or would a scarf be better than a cardigan? Oh, I can do both. :)
Posted by: Laura on March 8, 2006 12:51 PMLaura, I've added you to the list, as well as anyone else from today's comments that wasn't on the list already.
Posted by: Ryan on March 8, 2006 01:15 PMCount me in for the Dulaan Day! I love the idea!
Posted by: Rebecca on March 8, 2006 01:53 PMCount me in for Dulaan Day.
Posted by: Rachel H on March 8, 2006 02:15 PMI could certianly do a Dulaan Day. Did I not recently do a solo Casting On party for the Knitting Olympics, complete with brownies? (oh,yeah, the thigh problem - I thought it was just my car that wasn't working right) I like the idea of a week, because we could see photos of the different groups as the week goes on and be inspired.
Mary B in Richmond, are you in Richmond, Virginia? I'd like to get together with some other Virginia Dulaaners. We could even (gulp) have a Knit-In at my house if folks don't mind driving into the hinterlands.
Posted by: daisy on March 8, 2006 02:36 PMI think a Dulaan day/week would be great! I can see about organizing a knit-in here in Central Oregon too. By the way, I have a skein of mohair I bought for Cloud Hats. I actually bought two and used up one, but knitting with mohair is very irritating to me so I would love to send this skein on to someone who will use it for Dulaan. Would you like it Ryan? Or maybe you can just mention it on the blog and first person who chimes in can have it. I'll pay for the shipping.
Tee, tell your sister, absolutely it's ethical! Sure the hats were inspired by the Dulaan Project, but heck--anyone can knit 'em or wear 'em! Although ultimately they all ended up in the Dulaan Box, even I have "test worn" one or two of the Cloud Hats myself.
Posted by: Ryan on March 8, 2006 03:40 PMFor the Dulaan day, do the item we finish and the item we start have to be the *same* item? I seem to have this affliction of UFHBITLTGUTGADN--Unfinished Hat Because I'm Too Lazy To Go Upstairs To Get A Darning Needle so I can cinch the top up. Seriously, my hats can languish for *weeks* that way. It's sad.
Posted by: kirsten on March 8, 2006 04:31 PMI'd love to join in a Dulaan Day too. Sounds like fun!
Posted by: Laura G on March 8, 2006 05:08 PMI'm in!
Posted by: Rabbitch on March 8, 2006 06:18 PMI can't tell you how many UFOBICKFSIFINLAHNEIODSSIMMFTKFTS's I have (Unfinished Objects Because I Can't Knit For Squat -- In Fact I Never Learned And have No Earthly Intention Of Doing So Since It's Much More Fun To Kibbitz From The Sidelines).
Joan -- Houses are fine. Just don't knit with a pattern of Soviet-era underground heating ducts, OK?
Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on March 8, 2006 07:06 PMYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!!!
Tell me when, and I'll knit more for Dulaan!
My two finished Clouds are hovering in the fambly room, waiting for me to get back to the scarf I started. But I'm really looking for an excuse to get some 13" circulars and move on to ZUD.
So say the word! And BTW, when I enthusiastically waved the Cloud hats at my co-workers, I got requests to make some for them! Now I just need to teach THEM to knit, too!! Such wunnerful patterns, Ryan. You be proud.
Posted by: kt on March 8, 2006 07:54 PMA Dulaan day/week sounds great! Count me in!
Posted by: Beebs on March 8, 2006 10:03 PMyoubetcherboots!
Posted by: marylee on March 9, 2006 02:33 AMI haven't started yet but I plan to make 3 things at least. Probably hats.
Posted by: CarolineF on March 9, 2006 05:03 AMI'll do a Dulaan thing, and try to whip up some others for a pub night. As long as there are beer and chips, I think we can swing it.
Posted by: Mary de B on March 9, 2006 07:06 AMAll in favor of a Dulaan Day (or Week). I've gotten on a sweater kick so I don't think I could complete an item in a day but I'm willing to spend the entire day working on one. Does that count? :)
I'm not much of a hat knitter (hence my deciding it would be better to make 3 sweaters than a dozen hats) but your post today inspired an idea for an original hat pattern. I will work on it this weekend and write it up for you if it pans out!
Posted by: Denise in Kent, WA on March 9, 2006 08:13 AMCuzzin Tom - darn. Guess I have to take off the hammer and sickle? Actually, the houses look like Mayberry, RFD, so I doubt they'll have "that Soviet look" -- THANKS for the reply!
Posted by: joan on March 9, 2006 02:10 PMRandom aside - the Seattle Knitting Guild? Now that I'm on this side of the pond, I'm wondering if I should join. I've never been in a Guild before, and, um. Could use some info if anyone would like to share?
Posted by: moiraeknits on March 9, 2006 02:19 PMMoirae/Perclexed, here is the web site for the Guild: http://seattleknittersguild.org/
The meetings are the third week of every month, and I usually attend so, if you want to go, just let me know and we can hook up there. This month the meeting is on March 15th and the topic is "mini-classes," short teaching sessions on various topics from lace knitting to felting to moebius scarves.
Posted by: Ryan on March 9, 2006 02:53 PMCool, thank you Ryan. I'll definitely comment/email if I can go. Finally, I manage to remember to think about this *before* the monthly meeting. :)
Posted by: moiraeknits on March 9, 2006 04:37 PMA couple of things-
My name is Naomi, and there is a Naomi on your contributer list, but is was there as of 2 hours after I posted my participation a couple of months ago. I didn't think to check before. As there is a Naomi at my philly fiberist group (anj's house) and I think she is doing dulaan as well, I think that there are now at least 2 Naomis. I can also go by Naomi Kate. Martha should have sent in 5 hats and a scarf for me, and I have 5 more hats, a vest, almost a sweater, and a pair and a half of mittens to send in.
I am DEFINITELY up for a Dulaan day or (even better) week.
I would like to know where the number 4518 came from. Is it based on last year's achievments? Is this (dulaan) 1 or 2 years old?
I really love your blog. It is the first site I go to (followed by Anj's) When I have time to get on the internet at work. I have a live journal site, and I am trying to be a better blogger, but I have a frustrating home internet connection which makes that especially difficult, and I always want to wait for pics to post. I can't do pics at work.
I had a wonderful laugh at the idea of tinking squirrell butts.
Posted by: Naomi on March 14, 2006 09:04 AMUFOBOB - yes, absolutely! That's why I recently purchased a FOUR POUND lot of mixed buttons on eBay. Most of my knitting only needs a button here, a button there - nothing fancy, just A button. And now I will never have another UFOBOB as long as I live, hooray!
I would definitely participate in a Dulaan day, I've been putting off making a Dulaan hat, and only recently learned that THERE'S A DEADLINE - OMG I'd better get started!
Posted by: Erika on March 16, 2006 05:39 PM