March 10, 2006
Thank You, God!
The squirrels are breeding like…well, like rabbits:
Jeezaloo, but this is a slow knit! I repeat what I said mid-way through the Olympics: “A Norwegian-style stranded sweater in 16 days, even a 3-month size? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, heee, heee, heee, heee, heee, ho, ho, ho, har, har, har!!!!!” It doesn’t help that I had to tink the third row of squirrels for an imbecilic reason that even other knitters would pooh-pooh but the problem (an unintentionally slipped stitch, c'est tout) had gotten under my skin and Would Not Let Go. And, yes, the squirrels did shriek and cry in anguish in as they were reduced to nothingness, sort of like the witch in the Wizard of Oz. It was not pleasant.
Nor does it help to learn now, 3/4 of the way into the body of the sweater, that the color you want to have stand out more, in this case, the gray, is the color you should hold in your left hand. Guess what I’ve been doing?
However, may I say more fervently than I have ever said in the last five years, thank you, thank you, thank you, God, for knitting, and above all for arranging it so that I had my knitting in the car with me during the Wednesday afternoon rush hour, when, immediately after I had merged my car onto the highway and had inexorably committed myself to going over the bridge to get home, the chirpy chicky-babe on the radio announced, “They’ve closed the bridge due to bad weather,” and it took me three hours to drive the 12 miles home, three hours which were made marginally better by being able to tink squirrel butts.
(Non-Washingtonians, what you have to understand about the bridge is that it is a floating bridge. It rests directly on the water. This means that on stormy days, it bounces insanely around on the choppy water, making it theoretically possible to get seasick while driving on a state highway. And during a real doozy of a storm, the bridge will literally start to break apart. This has happened on more than one occasion, no lie. The fact that they opened it?—ultimately a wise decision, even though I aged considerably between 4:30pm and 7:30pm that night.)
So, while I go look for a meme to send to Norma, I leave you with this insanely adorable site of a woman who makes silver replicas of children's drawings.
P.S. Thank you to everyone who expressed interest in a Dulaan Day. I will mull over the logistics of this and keep you posted.
Posted by Ryan at March 10, 2006 02:07 PMI am normally not one of those people that fear going over bridges, but the photo of that one left me positively woozy.
Posted by: Annie on March 10, 2006 02:31 PMI'm glad you made it home safely, even if it was almost the next day. I would have gone mad stuck in traffic while tinking squirrel butts. At least TMK didn't have to watch.
Posted by: Elaine on March 10, 2006 02:52 PMElaine, when I got home, TMK and I both agreed it was A Very Good Thing she wasn't in the car. Fortunately, for the most part I was moving, but it did take me the three hours to go up north on 405, up over the top of the lake, and down Bothell Way because the 99,999 other cars that would have been on 520 did the same.
Posted by: Ryan on March 10, 2006 03:04 PMOooh, I saw that about the bridge on the news. And I laughed when I thought about the huge traffic difficulties it was going to cause for everyone.
Sorry.
Posted by: Christina in Washington on March 10, 2006 03:45 PMWhat I admire is the squirrels' ability to detach and levitate their tails.
Which for some odd reason reminded me of one of Woody Allen's funniest non-sequiters:
"My parents come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the old world. They're very stable down-to-earth people, who, ah, don't approve of divorce. Their, their...their values in life are God and carpeting.
"I came home on a Sunday, this was a long time ago, my father's watching television Sunday night, he's watching Ed Sullivan Show, on television, he's watching the Indiana Home for the Criminally Insane Glee Club on the Ed Sullivan Show. And my mother is in the corner, knitting a chicken, y'know. And I'd said that I would have to get a divorce, my mother put down her knitting, and she got up, and she went over to the furnace, and she opened the door, and she got in. Took it rather badly, I felt."
Ah, Cuzz; even though it has become unfashionable, I am a big Woody Allen fan, and your quotes remind me of why.
Posted by: Ryan on March 10, 2006 04:46 PMOkay. That's why we all thought the squirrel was a knitter's bad idea of a Rorschach inkblot: the first repeat of the little bugger DOESN'T HAVE FEET.
The second repeat: now, that there be a squirrel, lovey...
Posted by: Lee Ann on March 10, 2006 06:49 PMi like the idea of a dulaan day as well. however, PLEASE don't make it during hte week, i'll never get ANYTHING done. unless that day is memorial day, lol, and even then, it's doubtful (we make a journey 40 miles north to visit my dad & my grandparents)
Posted by: minnie on March 10, 2006 07:33 PMLooking for a meme to send me? You'll never FIND ME. I've left the country.
But you've got a frickin' FLOATING BRIDGE? Ok, I sense a "show me your bridge" meme comin' on. Seriously, an ON THE WATER bridge? You people must be nuts out there.
Posted by: Norma on March 10, 2006 08:42 PMOh my flippin GAWD I'm about to fall out of my chair lauging at you Ryan, for saying you'll send Norma a meme. lmao And at Cuzzin Tom because that quote is insanely funny. Laughing at Norma now. Everyone. These comments are hilarious. And those POOR POOR SQUIRRELS. Is it really all that funny or am I just staying up way too late? And the bridge. Yes, crazy nutty to feel "okay" about crossing a floating bridge with 99,999 other people every day (twice per day I assume).
Posted by: Laura on March 10, 2006 09:08 PMNow I am just wondering why it would make a difference to the standing out of the colours what hand you held what yarn in.
A bridge meme, fer sure, I'm in on that one!
Posted by: Mary de B on March 10, 2006 11:57 PMHelp me Rhonda................I think I'm finally turning into my mother because my first thought after reading that story was....I hope she didn't leave work saying to herself 'I'll just wait till I get home to pee'
Posted by: marylee on March 11, 2006 02:57 AMthank you for the childs artwork to silver pin site. i have some pictures in mind to send!
ryan, you are such a dedicated worker to commute over such a terrifing bridge 2X every day. i think i'd find a job closer to home. or maybe a scam to run. that's it, a knitting scam, to combine your favorite thing to do with creating alot of income.
i guess because it is so close to tax time i begin to wonder how one would pay taxes on knitting scam money. . .
Posted by: laura on March 11, 2006 05:00 AMOh, almost forgot, one more thing: is it even *legal* in Washington to tink squirrel butts? Maybe in Oregon, or Massachusetts...
It would be a great retort to "Your mama wears combat boots", though, don't you think?
"Oh yeah? Well *your* mama tinks squirrel butts!"
Posted by: Cuzzin Tom on March 11, 2006 07:26 AMLMFAO - now we know what the mean dogs say to Frankie in the park...
Posted by: Carrie on March 11, 2006 02:30 PMBut look at those lovely squirrel butts! Slow and steady wins the race, right?
Posted by: Kathy on March 11, 2006 03:49 PMThanks so much for mentioning my work on your site! I love what I do! Great knitting! I tried knitting but metalwork is more my speed, I dont have the patience for knitting.
Lee
Totally out of Hand
I used to live outside of Seattle (Redmond for a year) - and that bridge both facinates and terrifies me. I was lucky that I didn't have to drive over it every day.
Posted by: melissa on March 12, 2006 02:32 PM