March 23, 2007
Our Tax Dollars At Work
While it would be blogging suicide to try to compete today with the follow-up reports on the fabulous Represent Event, I shall nevertheless give it the old college try. I know! I shall distract you with The Story of The Magic Cone!
About two weeks ago a curious and slightly disconcerting hole appeared in TMK’s street.
But TMK was not too concerned because the Street Fix-It Guys came and solved the problem. They covered the hole with…a Magic Cone! The Magic Cone which mysteriously makes the hole invisible to tax-paying citizenry! Which means the hole no longer exists! Which means the problem no longer exists!
Can you see The Magic Cone, kiddies? Clap your hands if you can! Good job!
However, believers though we are, and staunch worshippers at the altar of The Magic Cone, we’re starting to wonder about its effectiveness since the cone itself is starting to fall into the (non-existent yet ever-widening) hole.
I guess we can no longer lie to ourselves. Perhaps the Magic Cone is not all it was cracked up to be. Perhaps the hole is still really there, and the magic was all a lie. Perhaps the Street Fix-It Guys are actually supposed to come do something more. Unfortunately, they believe in the Magic Cone even more than we do.
What I love best about this story is that TMK actually called the Street Fix-It Guys and left a message saying, “The hole is still there and it’s getting bigger. Your Magic Cone isn’t working.” I was on the floor.
I’m working on a “Dulaan” hat, quotation marks indicative of the fact that it may not make it into a Mongolia-bound box, I’m so enamored of it. I’m using a beautiful periwinkle Cascade 220 Quatro (#5017, although the yarn is much prettier than the photo would have you believe), and the free online seed-stitch-and-cable pattern “Hat Cosy” (sic) (Oh, actually, not sic. Stephanie has made me a little twitchy about these sorts of things so I looked up “cozy” and “cosy” and, sher 'nuff, "cosy" is the British way of spelling it. And, sher 'nuff, the pattern comes from Australia.). This hat is fun, quick, easy and rewarding to knit! (Is it just me or does the gray of the lavender behind the hat makes this look like a black and white photo in which the hat part has been colorized?)
Dulaaners, I’ve added a button on the left to the CafePress Dulaan site. As always, the profits all go straight to F.I.R.E. I see we’ve sold about 9 items so far, which is great! Please, go, buy. I can vouch for the quality of what they sell as I’ve been carrying my knitting around in a spacious and sturdy canvas CafePress Dulaan bag for a year now, and show up proudly at any and all Dulaan events wearing my CafePress Dulaan t-shirt.
Although we haven't thought this far ahead yet in our summer plans, look at what’s happened to the Seattle Mariner’s initially-just-local Stitch & Pitch idea! If you couldn't represent in New York, here's a chance for you to represent at a baseball game in your 'hood!
Oh, ALL RIGHT. Your naggin' got to me. I ordered a tank top. Don't blame ME if I'm so *hot* this summer that all the guys in the neighborhood are hanging out in my garden to see me in my new Dulaan tank top!
What'd the guy on the other end of the phone say to the "your magic cone is not working" thing? God, to have been a fly on the wall....
Posted by: Norma on March 23, 2007 11:22 AMWell, see, Norma, that's the problem. There IS no guy on the other end of the phone. All TMK can do is leave a message--and watch The Magic Cone slip deeper and deeper into the hole.
On behalf of F.I.R.E., thank you for buying the t-shirt, you hot mama, you!
Posted by: Ryan on March 23, 2007 11:25 AMI was just contacted by someone wanting to post local information for the Diamondbacks SnP this year. Kinda makes me want to go...
Posted by: Carrie on March 23, 2007 11:25 AMYou know it's spring in Seattle when you see car alignment specials all over, and you wonder if you've just popped a tire by driving down the street. Got to love those potholes!
Posted by: moiraeknittoo on March 23, 2007 11:27 AMMoirae: This hole has become research for my new book called "How to Create a Sinkhole, for Dummies." It's left the ordinary pothole stage behind. ;-)
Posted by: The Mysterious K on March 23, 2007 11:31 AMYou realize, TMK, leaving that message impugning the Magic Cone has only guaranteed that you-know-where will freeze over before that sink hole gets fixed, don't you? LOL
Love the Hat Cosy! It really does look like a colorized pic, too.
Posted by: Denise in Kent, WA on March 23, 2007 11:40 AMVery funny story about the cone. Of course, it would be much funnier if it weren't true, I'm sure.
Posted by: Miss T on March 23, 2007 11:45 AMJust think of all the places the magic cone could be placed to solve life's problems. Have a dropped stitch -- put a magic cone over it. In debt - put a magic cone over your credit card statements. Have a dent in your fender - MAGIC CONE!
Oh the places the magic cone could go.
I hope the street is fixed soon and isn't a magic sink hole!
Posted by: Rebecca on March 23, 2007 11:49 AMgotta love those tax dollars. i hope that tmk doesn't get sucked into that burdgeoning sink hole.
Posted by: marti on March 23, 2007 11:51 AMCute hat (I'm a sucker for all things cabled). The Magic Cone message reminds me of a time (I was in college of scads of years ago) when a collection agency called for someone in the family. I told them that they could not speak to the Gods (aka, the people they wanted to talk to), because they did not believe.
Not very nice of me, heh. I love the photo. I saw something similar where all of it was kind of grayed out except for the logos. Makes it look all artsy!
Posted by: Seanna Lea on March 23, 2007 11:52 AMPerhaps if you blog the hole's progress regularly and email the feed to the public works department? CC'd to the papers, the mayor... Blogging is a powerful tool.
Posted by: Ruth on March 23, 2007 12:02 PMMaybe they want to news to cover the event like the one in, is it Lynden? We have a few here in Renton/Kent, that are threatening to eat my van.
I checked out the Stitch n Bitch on the Mariners site just a few days ago. Maybe it really is going to be Spring/Summer, and we can stitch outside. Today, I am not convinced.
I've made use of the CafePress Dulaan store! I can personally vouch for the awesomeness of the Dulaan tote bag. And I also have a nifty Dulaan button on my jacket. Y'all go check it out! :)
The Cincinnati Reds are doing Stitch & Pitch this year - I can't wait!
Posted by: Julie on March 23, 2007 01:49 PMHiya, this is my first time commenting. I am having so much fun with your blog, I've even gone way back to April '03 to start from the beginning!
Do you supposed that if I put on a bright orange reflective vest and pray hard to the Magic Cone God that someone would appear with A Cone of Fix-it-ness for our street?
Ok I know this is getting long, but Lisa of Oregon are you still out there? I'm in Portland, fairly new to knitting and looking for other people to corrupt me with new yarn/patterns/fiber.
Posted by: Meghan on March 23, 2007 01:50 PMMaybe the cone needs a cosy?
Posted by: Jennifer on March 23, 2007 02:26 PMCarrie beat me to it. I was going to say that I thought Phoenix was holding SnPs also. What to do here in Portland? I thought I might try to organize an SnH at the Lumberjax game. (Lumberjax are the LaCrosse team so it is a Stich n' Hit)
Posted by: Laurie on March 23, 2007 02:58 PMThis is apropos of nothing, but I was driving in downtown Bellevue on Tuesday afternoon and ended up behind in a woman in a small black SUV with personalized plates that read TMK! Was it an actual sighting of your other half or does she have a Doppelganger?
Posted by: Laura on March 23, 2007 03:41 PMLaura--very curious indeed. However, had you been behind a large white truck, you would have had a greater chance of it being TMK. I'm afraid she has no Doppelnicknameganger.
Posted by: Ryan on March 23, 2007 03:49 PMWhat do I see *IN* the hole? Maybe it's a lighter -- which is fascinating enough -- but it could also be a shotgun shell casing.
What do you think? Now THAT would be BLOG FODDER!
Posted by: MaryB in Richmond on March 23, 2007 04:47 PMMaryB in Richmond: It's actually some sort of pipe wrap...which doesn't bode well for the water line directly below the hole. ;-)
Posted by: The Mysterious K on March 23, 2007 04:55 PMI love the message about the magic cone. One of my first thoughts was about cat logic, and that the road people must have a variation of it. You know, the old 'I can't see you, so you can't see me!' theory.
Hope it doesn't turn into a sinkhole and eat any cars or small children or anything!
Posted by: Anne on March 24, 2007 12:56 AMUnfortunately, there IS no-one at the offic elistening to the messages. We ARE talking about government employees, right?
Posted by: Carol on March 24, 2007 04:31 PMHeh. I can just hear her doing it, too. I hope they have a sense of humo(u)r. And some sort of plan to fix the street.
Posted by: Rabbitch on March 24, 2007 06:45 PMThanks for the Monday laugh! I LOVE the Magic Cone story! And as one who works for the evil street-fix-it construction people, I especially love it. What you need to do is not call the city people, call the area engineer's office of your Department of Transportation. If you bother THEM enough, they have a maintenance department that can be dispatched to fix the magic cone problem. You can find them conveniently located in the blue pages of your phone book. But you didn't hear this from me......lol!
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