January 09, 2008

Meat, Elephants and, Now, Blue Snot

Hi, Crazy Bag-o’-Meat Lady here.

First, and vastly most importantly, please join TMK and me in sending supportive, knitterly, bloggerly thoughts of love to Norma who had to put her dog-of-her-heart, Vincent, to sleep. We’all knew it was coming, but still… Hugs to you, Norma.

greybar.gif

If I take anything away from the emotional chaos that’s been TMK’s and my life for the last three months, it will probably be this: Hours into yet another one of our long, drawn-out and intense dialogues (or, more aptly, monologues, since it was mostly an outraged me yelling unidirectionally at her until her brain bled), I found myself saying, sincerely and emphatically since I was convinced it actually meant something important and deep at the time, “Tuesday is not your bathtub!” Tuesday?! Bathtub?! Not?! WTF?! Poor TMK. That’s the kind of psychobabble drivel I bring to our negotiation process. All I know is, in hindsight, the phrase (No, really, it meant something. At the time. Really. It had something to do with how my sister’s old cat used to think her bathtub was his “safe place” when he had been naughty and...oh, never mind. It’s not making any more sense now than it did before.) enchanted me enough that if I were to start a new blog, that’s what I would call it. The “Tuesday Is Not Your Bathtub” knitting blog. So much more fun than “Mossy Cottage,” mostly because it Makes. No. Sense. Whatsoever.

What else have I been struggling with this endless, eternally gray winter? Frozen laundry detergent, that’s what. See, if there’s one thing my real-life mossy cottage lacks is heat. And the detached garage? Why, it has none. No heat. And no insulation. And a cement floor which radiates cold with an almost sentient viciousness. Which became a problem in particular this year when, after welcoming into the fold my new washer and dryer, I had to switch to a high-efficiency liquid detergent. Which freezes quite readily. Which means it comes out of the bottle, if it comes out at all, like a cold mucous-y blue blob of snot, which then I actually have to pinch off with my fingers.

So, inexplicable bags of meat, the wacko rantings of a woman on the edge, and frozen jugs of blue snot—surely spring is somewhere around the corner?

Knitting, you ask? Why, yes, some knitting is going on. A pair of socks in the light blue Trekking in this picture, which is striping up in a completely unexpected way, some stripes fey and water-color-y, some bold and inna you face:

bluetrekking.jpg

After Disaster #2 with the Four-Acre sweater, I thought it was time to return to my knitting roots for a while. Aaaaaaah. That feels good.

Posted by Ryan at January 9, 2008 03:53 PM
Comments

Oh my. I have no idea what to say to Tuesday is not your bathtub (though I may co-opt it for my random blog subtitle one of these months). And the blue snot... well. As long as it isn't blue meat and a bag of snot, I suppose we'll be okay.

Posted by: Carrie on January 9, 2008 04:10 PM

Our bathtub is useless, I may start calling it Tuesday.

It was really nice to see you both last weekend. Hugs to you and TMK.

Posted by: Visionsister on January 9, 2008 09:28 PM

Oh, Ryan - I have an exercise: a while ago, Mr Dearling would find some odd phrase or quote, and I would have a time limit (one hour? one day?) to turn it into a children's story. May I, O May I, use "Tuesday is not your bathtub"? I'll e-mail the results when I actually do it (upon receipt of your permission). That's just such a juicy arrangement of words -- I LOVE the English language.

Posted by: dale-harriet in WI on January 9, 2008 10:05 PM

I know the laundry detergent issues! My laundry "room" is what used to be a sleeping porch in the 100-year-old house that my apartment's in. Needless to say, there is no insulation out there. I have to keep the detergent in the kitchen for the winter.

Posted by: Kristen on January 9, 2008 10:41 PM

I am in a state of frenzy and mild hysteria ... or maybe not so mild ... due to sudden changes (most good) in my life, however I have not yet yelled "Tuesday is not your bathtub" at anyone.

You made me laugh out loud. In the office, even.

Thank spot I work alone.

Posted by: Rabbitch on January 10, 2008 12:16 AM

I am so glad the blue snot is just laundry detergent. I was really concerned you might have done something to end up with blue snot. I mean, if you have had banana scented armpits...

You can definitely make me laugh. You are in my thoughts.

Posted by: PICAdrienne on January 10, 2008 02:11 AM

Ryan, bless you for your honesty (everybody has Troubles, and sometimes it's just good to know!).

"Tuesday is not your bathtub" does indeed make perfect sense in context. Who knows -- it may even enter the lexicon, like all those "Seinfeld" phrases that people use now, like "close talker" and such!

Hugs to both,

Posted by: MaryB in Richmond on January 10, 2008 04:31 AM

Thanks, youse two. And everyone else. Such loving thoughts make it so hard to be a hater.

At least you didn't say Tuesday is not your bath day. Which, you know, a mere few years ago wouldn't even have been considered weird, when, you know, SUNDAY was bath day. Heh.

Posted by: norma on January 10, 2008 04:48 AM

"Tuesday is not your bathtub" says it all. I understand it totally, even without an explanation. I hope you and TMK continue to have your long talks. Relationships are SUCH.HARD.WORK. Dang it.

And you had me worried about the blue snot...

Posted by: Cynthia on January 10, 2008 06:39 AM

I have to admit that while initially seeing that "Tuesday is not your bathtub" made no sense but reading through the post... it made all the sense in the world to me... seriously. sigh... relationships.

Posted by: marianne on January 10, 2008 06:51 AM

Oh my. Blue snot. What fun! That was one thing I HATED about switching to a HE washer..liquid detergent. I finally found that Costco had their brand of powder that worked in HE washers. It worked better than the Tide! It might be worth something to keep the blue snot at bay :)

Posted by: Stephanie on January 10, 2008 07:10 AM

Humphhh. Tuesday IS my bathtub, I'll have you know.

Posted by: kmkat on January 10, 2008 07:13 AM

Grasping desperately for coherence and rationality in the universe, my only response to your post is to note that you can get DRY high-efficiency laundry detergent--would that work?

Posted by: Janine on January 10, 2008 08:02 AM

Mmmmm.... Trekking. :)

Life is complicated. Be nice to yourself. Sending a hug, L

Posted by: Lisa in Oregon on January 10, 2008 08:54 AM

Oh, Ryan, "Tuesday is not your bathtub." I love it. Makes perfect sense to me. Love the blue snot too and meat bag. You have such a lovely slant on life. Welcome to the crazy years. It's fun here in over-40 land (and I'm waaaay over.).

Posted by: Barbara on January 10, 2008 09:03 AM

Thank you. I needed that laugh -- and it's good to know that I'm not the only one who yells exceedingly random things at her partner in the course of an argument (of course, if you tell him I acknowledged that randomness, I'll deny it all the way; I'm the sensible one in the relationship, doncha know). I'm making a note of your phrasing for future use; I'll be sure to cite you. :) Also, maybe the detergent needs its own little space heater?

Posted by: Jocelyn on January 10, 2008 09:17 AM

It might not help, but I have a high efficiency washer and I use regular soap in it, just not nearly as much (3 squirts to be exact). Hang in there, spring is on its way.

Posted by: Angie on January 10, 2008 09:29 AM

I have both those Trekking colorways and I can never get past petting them. No project seems worthy. I love the light colorway so much I bought two skeins thinking I would do a scarf too so I could admire it always.

Sounds like I need to go sit in the bathtub with my yarn for a while.

Posted by: Laurie on January 10, 2008 09:33 AM

I have to keep my liquid laundry detergent in the house instead of the unheated garage above my washing machine in the winter. Of course, whether I get to use it or not depends on if my washer is frozen. No draining when the pump is immobile. My dream house will certainly have the washer and dryer in a (heated) laundry room. And who says you have to be logical in the heat of a "discussion"? Not me!

Posted by: Joan in Reno on January 10, 2008 09:36 AM

Do they make the high efficiency stuff in powder form because that would solve your problem! See how helpful I am!?!

Posted by: Rebecca on January 10, 2008 10:14 AM

Ryan - on the detergent front. Trader Joe's has a great powdered ecologically friendly detergent - just use about half the amount that they tell you to. Walla - clean clothes & it only clumps. Hang in there - the days are getting longer and for some reason that always has an effect on my coherency. In fact, more daylight seems to help in all facets of life.

Posted by: Beth in Seattle on January 10, 2008 11:13 AM

You're the reason I don't blog. Why would anyone need another blog when yours is so well-written, so engaging, so honest, so perfectly capturing the simultaneous absurdity and profundity of life? You're probably getting scared now because I'm sounding like a love-sick groupie. (I did "squee" once when you emailed me.) BTW, can I drop by when I come out to visit the in-laws in Tacoma? Just kidding. I'll settle for just coming to your knitting group.

Posted by: Laura Sue on January 10, 2008 11:40 AM

My laundry/mudroom is on the north facing wall. If the machine isn't frozen, the detergent usually is. Blue snot, indeed.

Posted by: Annie on January 10, 2008 11:45 AM

Ahem. So busy being star-struck that I forgot to make "actual knitting content" comment. As a very bad and new sock knitter, one of those balls of trekking will make a pair? Gad. I bought 3.

Posted by: Laura Sue on January 10, 2008 11:59 AM

It makes perfect sense to me. Then again, I never make sense and am currently hormonally challenged. *hugs*

Posted by: Cookie on January 10, 2008 11:59 AM

As the target of psychobabble, I would LOVE to hear "Tuesday is not your bathtub". It would make a nice change from the tedious (and well deserved) crud I usually hear.

Posted by: ellen on January 11, 2008 11:15 AM

The babble doesn't seem too weird to me, but I talk in weird wimperings and tired whinings a lot of the time. At least you used words.

Posted by: Seanna Lea on January 11, 2008 12:04 PM

Hi, just an idea from my dealings with high efficiency detergent... switch to powdered tide HE. I had some significant problems with odors from the front loading washer... and it turns out that the liquid detergent (all liquid, not just HE) does not dissolve well, leaves a film inside the washer drum that traps organic matter, and then germs can grow... NOT what you want in your washer. No more problems since a severe cleaning and the use of powdered tide. and it will not freeze!!

Posted by: Lee Cockrum on January 11, 2008 07:18 PM

Tuesday may not be your bathtub, but Thursday is definitely sandwich day. :-)

Hugs to you both.

Posted by: morenna on January 13, 2008 05:59 PM
Post a comment