April 11, 2008
What Were They Thinking?!
Granted, I work for the state, and money is tight, and getting tighter all the time. We even have to dig deep to pay for our own coffee, creamer, sugar, and birthday cakes. But sometimes…
This week we received notice that some of the carpeting was going to be glued down. I assumed, as you would, that this meant that rips and curled corners would be pasted into place, perhaps that even really bad spots would be cut out and replaced. But after seven years here, I should’ve known better. Under each desk in my department, the old, thin, gray carpet has become stretched and horrendously rumpled from the movement of the office chairs. They glued the rumples in place. Seriously. Didn’t stretch it and glue it. They just glued the rumples, as is, all up and down and sideways, all the little hills and valleys, into place, into permanent—and now plastic-hard, and hard to roll over—rumples. Between the Darth Vader-esque vending machines (which are now—deliberately, I suspect—dispensing sodas with long-past pull dates) and permanently glued carpet rumples, I do wonder about this place sometimes.
Went with TMK to her monthly spin-in at Village Yarn & Tea last night. I took the finished Splock with me and showed it to the knitters there. It was hysterical to watch them pass it gingerly around as if it were a particularly ugly baby, and with slightly pitying looks that said, You want to say something nice, but you just can’t. It won’t grow out like a bad haircut, it won’t grow into its huge schnozz, it’s not an ugly duckling with a fairy-tale future—it just is what it is: a Splock. But it’s fast growing on me. Soon, I think it will be my favorite sock. In fact, I think I will change my will and leave everything to it.
For the record, I am now the owner of a new set of bamboo size-1 knitting needles, thanks to muscle-bound needle-torturer TMK. I teased her that they were a little long (8”) but that that was okay, because I’d just break 1” off one end. She gave me The Look, and for a brief moment, I was glad I was not a bamboo needle. And for all you wiseacres, specifically my mischievous Cuzzin, I actually had a good reason for not carrying TMK’s wheel for her: She came to Ferals from home, I came to Ferals from work, and never the twain shall meet. Hah.
This week I officially met Lovie Harris, the recipient of all the beautiful things sent for the Baby Harris project, and who is now an adorable, happy, curious three months old. I also met Lori Harris, Lovie’s mother, who wants to let everyone know how much she appreciated the knitted items and quilts that were sent to her. She would like to send a personal email to everyone who participated, and since I’ve long lost my list, if you sent something for the Baby Harris project, would you email me at rymorriss@yahoo.com and let me know? Then I’ll send the email addresses on to Lori.
The dishcloths for the Cotton Club keep coming in! We’re up to 29 beautiful squares and a I know there are a lot more floating around out there in the ozone. A couple of you have asked for my address, which I promise to send out soon. So exciting!! Thank you, everyone!
Another heart stopping moment: "They glued the rumples in place." So that's the kind of thing my tax dollars go to the city (of Pittsburgh) for! {sigh}
Posted by: Kristen on April 11, 2008 12:36 PMUmmm, is it weird that I kinda like the Splock? It has appeal. Of course, this is coming from a woman who just adopted a dog who looks like she's going to grow into a giant version of a corgie, so my compliments may not mean much...
Posted by: Jocelyn on April 11, 2008 12:57 PMI personally love the Splock. I think you need to rename it, though. Not Splock. It needs to be a SPLOCK! Your SPLOCK! will be the best in the neighborhood. Everyone will want a SPLOCK! like yours. Then you can tsk the newcomers and know that your SPLOCK! was the original SPLOCK!
Posted by: Carrie on April 11, 2008 01:07 PMI personally cannot understand how the undyed bits of the yarn managed to all come together in the different areas that are white. It is uncanny, kind of like that physics phenomenon where twin particle billions of light years apart somehow each know what the other is doing. Or something like that...
Posted by: kmkat on April 11, 2008 01:44 PMTwo things...
Sometimes... in the middle of the night... things just "happen" which force a short-sighted bureaucracy to have to fix their earlier stupidities. In the case of this carpet affair, large sections of carpet might mysteriously just disappear around the said glued-down areas which would require them to be replaced. It might appear as if they were cut-out with a utility knife, but that would be pure speculation of course. Another solution (more direct and definitely more obvious) is to threaten an OSHA claim over the trip-hazard that was created through blatant stupidity and negligence. I've found that people often sit up and pay attention when the word "Lawsuit" is used in a sentence. Maybe it's just because I used to work for lawyers, but I've often heard that the cost of replacing a carpet is much cheaper than defending a lawsuit...
On the Splock... I know what the lower one is now. I was holding back because I wasn't sure at first, but after looking at it awhile, now I'm sure. I think you've channeled the spirit of Casper the Friendly Ghost and, somehow subconsciously knitted this so that his image appears in the lower white blobual. The upper one might be one of his unfriendly brothers, but I'm not sure. You know... you could get some serious coin if you put this on ebay. If you wanted to really jack up the price, just tell people that it's the Virgin Mary. ;-)
It's not just the state. I work for a large company which made $3 billion last quarter of last year (read the preceeding as layoffs, closing of sites, etc while the CEO got a $3 million bonus) and we have to buy our own tea, cocoa, creamer, birthday cakes...but they did pawn off the leftover 50-cent pocket calendars for 2008 on us last week...
Posted by: Nina on April 12, 2008 07:32 AMRyan, your Splock and my Pooling House Sock look like they are, at the least, distant cousins. I have to say I was relieved when the 2nd sock started to super-pool; at least they're fraternal twins. It would have been bad if one sock was "normal" and the other wasn't.
I hope you don't get seasick navigating the waves of your office carpeting. Viva les government employees!
Posted by: Barbara on April 14, 2008 08:58 AMSplock. Hm. Is this Trekking? Has it let us down? The colors are so pretty, though. I work for the state, too. No accounting, sometimes. Literally.
Posted by: Laura Sue on April 15, 2008 06:49 AM